After Great Pain ~ 痛 苦 之 夏 , 煎 熬 的 花 ；輾 轉 反 側 , 瞧 盼 秋 涼 ~ After Cruel Long Summer Season what Survived Continuously Flowering ‧China Crisis『中 國 危 機』

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After great pain a formal feeling comes
The nerves sit ceremonious like tombs;
The stiff Heart questions
was it He that bore?
And yesterday -or centuries before?

The feet, mechanical, go round
A wooden way
Of ground, or air, or ought,
Regardless grown,
A quartz contentment, like a stone.

This is the hour of lead
Remembered if outlived,
As freezing persons recollect the snow
First chill, then stupor, then the letting go.

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曾經在痛苦不堪的夏夜醒來
站到窗台才感受到一點清涼
但是昏沉的意識 不知道自己活著 還是死了
被憂鬱弄壞的胃翻攪心頭的苦痛 如同你留給我的

窗戶後頭 長者房間的收音機未關
透出一陣清新的節奏 恍惚的我在窗台前 試著搜集記憶
許久後 我告訴自己這是 China Crisis 的 Black man ray
我沒好奇怎麼難得
八O 年代的新浪潮名曲 出現在這時候
我從不知道一首歌 可以如此透徹 清涼 乾淨與遙遠 . .

窗台外的花草 不比我好
在酷夏炙焰的考驗中 它們於夜裡喘息
活下來的瞧盼入秋 開出重生春色的花

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Ample make this bed
Make this bed with awe
In it wait till Judgment break
Excellent and fair.

Be its mattress straight
Be its pillow round
Let no sunrise' yellow noise
Interrupt this ground.

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English poems by Emily Dickinson ( 10 Dec. 1830– 15 May 1886 ), published in 1955.

Movie images from Alan Pakula film Sophie's Choice, starring Meryl Streep, Kevin Kline, and Peter MacNicol, 1982..

Kevin Wilkinson, drummer of China Crisis, hanging himself at the age of 41 in July 1999.

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© 2009 Jero Smith 朱